purple haze

Had a terrible, terrible day yesterday. The only things that saved me were a sweet testimonial and the whole Dan Rather thing. I especially loved the bit about the girl riding on the back of the turtle- I don’t know why, but it really cheered me up. I read a lot of Roald Dahl growing up. Otherwise, everything seemed to be going wrong that possibly could: I woke up late, Yarrot took me aside to say that he didn’t like my white-on-white work and lowered both my quarter and semester grades, ms. Daly made me explain the derivation of quadratic equations to the whole class (which I couldn’t) just because I was trying to listen to Rachel’s recount of her terrible weekend during class, my sister called me a slut and said that by being outgoing I make her feel depressed, the newspaper fell a page short of the number of spreads we needed (meaning another week of work on my part), I lost my ipod headphones… I won’t obsess over it, but all in all it sucked. At sixth period I went to the bathroom to brush my hair and ended up crying like a little girl. I ducked into a stall when someone came in and ended up late to English (where my phone rang twice and we finished Othello for good). I was sick as all hell and couldn’t think straight, and by the time I got home I didn’t know who I was any more. I tried to update my blog three times, but AOL (grr…) kept quitting on me. Harry called me at about ten and I just broke down and started sobbing into the phone. As always he was incredibly loving and wouldn’t let me go until I’d told him everything and was sufficiently calmed and comforted, and kept insisting on coming over to see me (even though he’d just left and his dad was nagging him about his college stuff). finally I dissuaded him and listened to Blood on the Tracks and cried a bit more and fell asleep with cold fingers under six Mexican blankets.

Today I woke up and decided that no matter what happened I wouldn’t let myself get that upset again. And I didn’t. I blew off all my newspaper obligations all day, ate french fries for lunch, found my ipod headphones, bought concert tickets for next month, had a picture taken of me lying on top of Alex DaSilva (“promise you won’t show it to Harry? I’m afraid of him.”), and generally made a fool of myself in the best way possible. I put off my homework until seven after seeing MacGyver for the first time with Will and Oona and Harry (“I don’t trust you to do anything straight, Murdoc!”), although halfway through it I started feeling self-conscious again. Afterwards Harry came over and cheered me up (as always) and I realized that I don’t have as much homework as I thought I did. I consequently blew off everything that wasn’t absolutely necessary and read Othello and The Importance of Being Earnest and generally felt cozy. Sometimes I wish there were nothing in my life but friends, good books and hot chocolate.