I'm one of those people who's a little phobic about operations and barely differentiates between brain surgery and facial hair removal. Or wisdom-teeth removal. Now Harry's of on 79th street bleeding from his gums and I'm smacking myself repeatedly for not having woken up earlier or grabbed a cab in my pijamas and gotten there in time to hold him for just a moment, even if he'd just laugh at me. The whole house is empty and I'm getting nervous. My stomach is making weird sounds but all we have to eat is bread, and I'm not really very hungry, anyway. I've tried distracting myself with books or the internet or cleaning up but I can't bring myself to do any of it. I don't really know what to expect after this, or what to do to make things better. In short, my maternal instincts are kicking in at a time when they're somewhat useless, because there isn't anything I can do.